डिभोर्सपछि आफ्नै घर पनि नर्क जस्तो लाग्छ
डिभोर्स अगाडी श्रीमानको घर जेल जस्तो लाग्थ्यो।
आज डिभोर्स भएको तीन बर्ष पछि आफ्नै घर नै नर्क जस्तो लाग्छ।
मैले बिहे गर्दा मेरो उमेर १९ बर्षको मात्रै थियो। मैले आफ्नै रोजाइमा बिबाह गरे,मेरो श्रीमान शान्त स्वभावको काम काजी थिए । तर अलिकति जिद्दी उसले भनेपछि हुनै पर्ने, उसको कुरा मेरो भन्दा अलि माथि हुन्थ्यो तर मनमा नराम्रो चाहिँ थिएन।
झण्डै तीन बर्ष सम्म हाम्रो सम्बन्ध रह्यो । त्यसबेला हाम्रो एक बर्षको छोरा थियो।
बिहे पछि सुरु सुरुमा सबैकुरा राम्रै चलिराको थियोे। तर म एकदम भावुक किसिमको थिए, अलिक रिसालु पनि थिए। श्रीमानले थोरै मेरो बारेमा नराम्रो केही भनेमा तुरुन्तै झोला बोकेर माइत जाने गर्थे। त्यसबेला दिदी भिनाज, दाजु भाउजू, भाइ बुहारी आमाबुबा सबै मेरो पक्षमा उभिन्थे। किनकि मैले सधै ज्वाइँले ममाथि गरेको व्यबहार सुनाउथे तर मैले गरेको गल्ती चाहिँ लुकाउथे। त्यसबेला सबैले मेरो श्रीमानलाई नै दोषी देख्दथे , र मलाई सहारादिन्थे – अनि मेरो गल्ती केही छैन सबै त्यसैको गल्ती हो, भनेर मैले पनि सोच्ने गर्थे र ह मा ह मिलाउथे ।
एकदिन कुरै कुरामा हाम्रो झगडा भयो- कुनै पनि श्रीमतीले आफ्नो श्रीमानलाई नभन्नुपर्ने कुरा जो हरेक पुरुष लाइ सहन असहज हुन्छ तेस्तो सब्द मैले प्रयोग गरे मैले भने। त्यसबेला रिस र उत्तेजनामा उसको सहनशीलता फुट्छ, उसले त्यो कुरा सहन सकेन र उसले मलाई आक्रोस हुदै एक झापड हान्यो- त्यो एक झापडले मेरो सोच संग्गे आक्रोस उत्पन्न गरायो ।
रिसाएर झोला र नानी च्यापेर बुबाको घर आए। आफुले गरेका भनेका गल्ती लुकाएर रुँदै मैले उसको गल्ति देखाए कराको हप्काको कुटेको कुरा सुनाए, । त्यसबेला सबै मेरो माइती पक्षले (अब त्यस्तो राक्षस सँग बस्नु पर्दैन, त्यसलाई मुद्दा हाल भने) मैले पनि कतै के हि नसोची उसको नाउँमा महिला दुर्व्यवहारको मुद्दा दायर गरे। प्रहरीले उसलाई भगायो, उसको आमाबुबाले मुद्दा फिर्ता गर्न बारम्बार मलाई आग्रह गरे।म फेरी सोच्न थाले
म राति ओछ्यानमा सुतेर सोच्ने गर्न थाले , के उ साँच्चै नै नराम्रो मान्छे थ्यो त उ तेस्तो होइन अनि किन यस्तो गर्यो त् यसै राम्रा नराम्रा कुराहरु ?
केही दिनपछि उसले मलाइ सम्झियो धैर्य गर्न सकिन भन्दै उसले माफी माग्यो।
मैले मुद्दा फिर्ता लिए, तर म उ सँग उसको घरमा गइन।म माइत मै गए केही दिन पछि दुई परिवार मिलेर बस्नु अब नयाँ तरिकाले जीवन यापन गर्नु भन्दै परिवार ले सम्झाउन थाले अनि राम्रा कुरा मात्र गर्न थाले र भने। म पनि सहमत भए।
पहिलो केही महिना राम्रैसँग बित्यो। तर अचानक फेरि झगडा भयो- म फेरी आवेग मा आए र म फेरी माइती घरमा आए।
केही दिन पछि मेरो श्रीमान बिरामी छन भनेको कुरा सुने। माइतीघरका सबैले स्वास्नी फर्केर आउछे भनेर नाटक गरेको हो भन्न थाले नौटंकी हरु भने । तर उ मेरो श्रीमान् थियो जति कलह भए पनि मनमा माया पलाए झैँ भयो मैले सोच्न थाले कोहि उसका आफ्नो आफन्त लिएर यहाँ आओस् त्यसपछि उनिहरुको साथमा जान्छु भन्ने मनमा सोचे।
तर कोहि आएनन्। बरु घरमा एउटा पत्र आउँछ- सम्बन्धविच्छेद पत्र।
पत्र हातमा परेपछि मेरो मन मुटुमा दनदनी आगोले पोले जस्तो भयो, अनि सोचे, यो आट उसमा कहाँबाट आयो? किन एक्कासी यस्तो गरेको मनमा अनेक प्रश्न हरु उब्जिए |
कति गाह्रो भयो, सहनै सकिन्,
तर मेरा माइतीपक्षले भने “कुचोले बढार्नुपर्ने कसिङ्गर हावाले उडायो” भन्दै कुरा गर्न थाले बरु अदालतमा गएर छोराको पढाइ लेखाइको लागि मासिक खर्च र अंश माग्न सुझाव दिए।
तर यता मेरो मुटुमा भने १००० किलोको ढुंगाको वजनले थिचे जस्तो महसुस हुँदै थियो, सास फेर्न गाह्रो भएको थियो।
मनमा तनाब उत्पन्न भन्यो केहि राम्रो नराम्रो सोच्न सकिन माइती पक्ष् को कुरा मात्र सहि झैँ भयो किनकि उनीहरुले मात्र उसलाई गलत भन्दै थिए म पनि तेतै गए त्यसबेला एक सब्द पनि नसोची सबै कुरा स्वीकार गरे।
बच्चा मसँग आयो, आर्थिक सुरक्षा- र उसको हातबाट म स्वतन्त्र भए।
आज साढे तीन बर्ष बितेछ। उसले फेरि नजिकैको स्कुलमा पढाउने शिक्षिका बिहे गरेको छ रे, सुन्छु धेरै राम्री छे रे- तर म?
मेरो जिन्दगी जहाँ छ त्यही रोकियो- यो संसारमा लोग्ने मरेकासँग बिहे गर्न बढी रुचाउँछन् तर हामी डिभोर्सी सँग रात कटाउन घुमाउन साँच्चै भन्ने हो भने रातकी रानी र रखेल बनाएर राख्न रुचाउँदा रहेछन्।
आज म सोच्ने गर्छु- एउटा गल्ती, अलिकति जिद्दी, रिसको एक झिल्कोले मेरो पुरै परिवार सधैंको लागि सकियो।
उसले मलाई एकपटक एक झापड हान्यो- तर मैले उसलाई सहनै नसक्ने शब्द भने, मेरो अहंकार र माइतीघरको सपोर्टको घमण्डले उसलाई बारम्बार दु:ख दिए। आज मैले बुझ्दै छु, परिवारमा जोडिएर बस्नु भनेको माफी दिनु , आफू अनुकुल हुनु, मायामा कमि हुन नदिनु रहेछ। तर यो सबै मेरो भाग्यमा रहेन।
सम्बन्धविच्छेद गरेपछि स्वतन्त्र हुन पाइन्छ- भनेर जसले सोचिरहेका छन। स्वतन्त्र होइन यो एक प्रकारको एक्लो कारागार हो, जेल हो बन्दी हो।
जब सबैको परिवार जोडिएर बसेको देखिन्छ, खुशी जीवन हुन्छ त्यसबेला आफ्नो एक्लो कोठा नर्क जस्तो लाग्छ।
दिदीबहिनीहरु तपाइँ हरु आफ्नो श्रीमानसँग झगडा गर्नु, तर रिसमा डिभोर्स भन्ने शब्द नल्याउनु। आफू अलिक नरम बन्नु, श्रीमानलाई अलिक छुट दिनुस सायद त्यसले तपाईंको पुरै जिन्दगी नै बद्लिन्छ। अर्को कुरा माइतीले पनि आफ्नो बिहे गरेर गाकी छोरीलाई चाडपर्वमा बाहेक अरुबेला बोलाउने चलाउने काम नगर्नु होला। आफ्नो बुहारीलाई जस्तो आफुले गरेको छ्, त्यही कुरा आफ्नो छोरीमा पनि पालना हुन्छ भनेर सधैं सोच्ने गर्नु होला !
किनकि बुढा पाका सबैले भन्ने गर्छन | बिबाह जिबन मा एक पल्ट मात्र गर्नु पर्छ जो संग्ग गरिन्छ उसै संग्ग जिन्दगि बिताउन पर्छ | हो मैले आज आएर थाहा पाए साचै बिबाह त् जिबनमा एक पल्ट मात्र गर्नु पर्ने रहेछ |
जिबन साथि संग्ग दुख सुख उकाली ओराली हरेक मोड मा साथ् मिलेर जानु पर्ने रहेछ साथ् मिलेर भोग्नु पर्ने रहेछ | कम्प्रमाइज गरेर होइन | #BY DIL ABIRAL
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